It’s that time of the year again, children across Australia are preparing to transition to the next phase of they educational journey.
Whether you are a parent or teacher these are my handy little tips to ease children’s anxiety about starting kinder, primary school or even high school.
Firstly, let’s consider what school transition or orientation period means for the little or big people in our lives. Take yourself back to the day you started a new job or joined a new group, what feelings were cycling through your body? Fear, self doubt, excitement, nervousness, happy…. Well our children experience the same emotions however without the emotional regulation tool bag and skills that we have as adults.
Let’s remember that developmentally children’s brains and cognitive functions are still developing and neural pathways are strengthening.
So starting kinder, primary school or high school can be BIG and stressful transitions for some children. Even moving from one grade to the next are big changes for children. These transitions and milestones are like children having to learn a new language. What use to happen at kinder may no longer be at school ie. at kinder children maybe use to a pack up song, however at primary school a teacher says “pack away”. There are small changes and big changes in transitions; even if we consider the physical environment - different routines and schedules, different teachers, the classroom and sensory changes (new sounds, lighting, smells movements and uniforms just to name a few). With change and unpredictability we no doubt may encounter behaviours and meltdowns which are related to emotional needs and struggles to communicate.
So, how do we make these transitions less stressful and anxious for our children. It is impossible to put in a plan for every change, but we can plan for changes that we are aware of and put structures in place to help ease the change.
So here we go….
1. Social Stories
As orientation programs can vary from 6 sessions to just 1 session, with sessions often occurring months before children actually start their new kinder or school. A social story can help children become familiar with their new educational setting.
Have photo’s of the classroom, the gate that your child will enter, their locker (bag hook), playground, teacher and toilets.
Attention Teacher’s create a social story for the children using photo’s rather than cartoon images. Children are literal thinkers, if you have extra resources to make a short video of kinder or school in action it provides children with a realistic sense of what kinder or school is like (the busyness, noise level which is great for neurodiverse children to know and for their parents to prepare for).
I have a FREE Social Story about starting school that you can customise for your child, Here is the link: https://www.parentsdomain.com.au/shop/my-new-school-social-story
2. Extra Visit
For neurodiverse children or children who are anxious or children who have no siblings or friends attending their school, arrange a quick 15 minute visit a few days before school starts. This allows children to say hi to their teacher and familiarise themselves with their classroom, playground, toilet and bag area.
3. Lunch Routine
Practice using lunchboxes and drink bottles ensuring children can open and close them. Can they open a sandwich wrapped in glad wrap or a zip locked bag.
Also consider playtime, take photo’s of the playground and brainstorm play activities with your children. I can not stress enough the importance of practicing structured games at home - duck duck goose, what’s the time mr wolf, doggie doggie, fruit salad etc. You might like to ask the teachers what games do the children play at your child’s school. Practicing these games means that your child becomes confident with play and then only needs to navigate the social experience.
4. Clothing
Practice putting on and taking off jumpers, velcro and buckles on shoes. Often a new uniform can make children say “it makes my skin itchy” (this sure did happen with my eldest). Regularly wash uniform to get the stiffness out of them and to help children with sensory sensitivity.
5. Visit
If you can get to your child’s kinder and school during the day especially at playtime and do some “people watching” with your child, it helps cement a visual image of what playtime really looks like at school. (You might want to give the lead educator at kinder or principal a heads up so they know what you are doing).
Over the school holidays visit the the school, even though they may be closed, just going and having a look through the gate and talking about what you can see.
6. Validate Their Emotions
Let’s put ourselves in our children’s shoes and the equivalent comparison for adults would be starting a new job. Remember how that feels? Validate and acknowledge feelings. Practice calming strategies that help to combat those tricky nerves such as breathing exercise, counting exercises, tense and release progressive muscle, fidgets, sensory items etc.
Don’t forget your own emotions, these are also big moments for us. Children will feed off our emotions. If we are nervous and panicky they will be too. Remember to breath and take a moment. I remember holding my emotions in and release the waterfall of tears the minute I stepped out of the classroom.
7. Transitional Object
For those children with separation anxiety having an item tucked in their pocket that they can hold onto to know that mum or dad are not too far away. I sewed a love heart on my girls school dress so if they were feeling a little sad or worried throughout the day they could turn over the hem of their dress and there was a small fabric heart that they could rub.
8. Step Ladder
For those children that really find separating hard, a step ladder approach is a great way to slowly build children’s confidence and tackle those BIG worries. A stepladder approach is a step by step visual guide that you develop with your child and slowly work on one step at a time.
Image from mindfulmazing
9. Role Play
Play schools with your younger child and those who have older children who may be starting a new school role play conversation starters, making new friends, how to get to know people, inviting friends to play, brainstorming when friends don’t want to play.
10. Student Profiles
Have any allied health professional or teacher complete a brief but concise profile on your child which outlines their diagnosis, social skills, emotions and emotional regulation, behaviour and function of behaviours and communication skills.
11. Calendar
Don’t forget to create a calendar in January, maybe two weeks before kinder/school starts. This gives children a visual sense of “how many” days till I start kinder or school.
I hope you found those tips helpful if you are a parent or teacher.